"I Miss my Daddy"

My husband is on the big "D".  So I've been the mommy and the daddy for the past six months.  All military families deal with this, it might not be the lifestyle we choose but it's a lifestyle we learn to deal with.  My almost 4 y/o has been doing pretty good so far.  We have been able to hear her daddy's voice every once in a while and she understood that her daddy was working on his ship.  The past week has been extremely difficult for both of us.  She's been telling me every night before we close our eyes for the day "I miss my daddy.  I want daddy to go home."  The past three nights she's been crying herself to sleep telling me "I want my daddy. I don't like his ship anymore. I want daddy to go home."

 At anytime before he was selected for chief I had the open of calling his department so he could talk to her for a few minutes.  No, I'm not one of those wives that call all the time or even on a frequent basis.  However, I was fortunate enough to have a hubby work in a field that has access to phone, if I really need to get a hold him.  It helped keep most of the meltdowns at bay and I credit that to how long she's been okay with the big "D".

Now that he's busy with chief training we haven't really had many conversations with him due to his schedule.  I think that combined with the length of time he's been gone has taken its toil on my toddler.  I could see signs that she needed her dad even before this past week.  She would cling to my brother in law, our baby sitter's husband and the other day she hugged the delivery guys leg.  (That freaked me out!)

Last night she was finally able to hear his voice.  She took over the phone and told him all about her day, all her little owies and how much she missed him.  It didn't take much just the sound of his voice.  I don't doubt it was hard for him to hear her whisper "I miss you daddy. I love you daddy. Can you come home and play with me?"  I was certainly tearing up hearing their conversation.  Now we're just counting down the days.  Are you a military wife?  How do you deal with long separations?

Toddler with a 'Tude

Any mom to a toddler can tell you that everyday can be a challenge dealing with their ever changing emotions from happy to screaming bloody murder at some real or imagined slight.  This toddler mom feels like mommy of the year some days and most other days feels like nothing works.  What I want to know is if this new personality I'm dealing with has to do with following a bad example or just part of the growing pains.

She's been giving me sass lately and ignoring me when I tell her to do something.  I'm talking about standing there with her hands on her hips, rolling her eyes up in her head and giving me a flippant remark.  Yesterday, she tried talking back to me and complained the entire time she was in time out.  Even though she knew the more she talked back the longer her time out would be.  She ended up falling asleep on the couch and finally giving mommy a hour break.

I'm feeling at a loss here on how to proceed.  The new baby is coming and the short time I currently have to spend with her will mostly be taken up with the new baby.  I don't want her behavior to get to the point of no return.  Yet, what I'm doing to correct it only seems like a temporary band aid.  I just wish I knew if this acting out is a normal process for 3 almost 4 year olds.  Is it due to following another child's bad behavior or even acting out from the upcoming baby?  If only children came with manuals most of my hair would still be black and not grey.  What do you think readers?  Have you gone through this with your child?  Did you link it to something specific like baby #2 or a bad example?  What worked for you at home?

Tantrum

Tantrums.  Yes, that one would can in fact strike fear in a full grown adult.  When I was a new mom I would hear horror stories about toddler tantrums and the terrible twos.  I also saw many frazzled parents dealing with their own terrible two year old.

As my own daughter began developing her tantrums my parenting strategies changed to take into account her bad behavior.  Some days it seems like whatever it is I'm doing is working.  While other days, I want to crawl into a dark hole and hid.  What's even worse is the more my child is developing her language skills and motor skills the tantrums are only getting worse, not better.  WHY, WHY, WHY?!?!?  Shouldn't it be the other way around?  Now that she's able to tell me what she wants shouldn't the her frustration go down?

Today's tantrum was in epic proportions.  I had an unexpected day off when my day care called to say the are close for possible mold.  So I thought it would be a great idea to check out the child's concert in the park at Silver Lake.  Tim Noah was there and the concert was free.  I never heard of the guy but I guess he's this big singer of children's songs.

Izzy had a great time singing, dancing, and jumping around during the concert.  We even stayed after to play on the amazing play ground.  I would have let her play longer but it was very crowded and I had a big bag of things I couldn't lug around while chasing after her.

Once I told her it was time to go, she flipped.  This child screamed nonstop for 40 minutes.  She screamed on the way out of the park, through two time outs trying to leave the park, in the car ride home, unpacking the car and refused to take a nap.  I have never seen her THAT bad.  She has here moments but never screamed at FULL volume the entire tantrum.  I was so surprised that I didn't get flustered and kept me cool the entire time.  I even stuck to my guns and had her sit in a time out and made her say sorry to get out of it.  She thought she was off the hook and when I kept trying to leave the screaming continued.

What was your child's worse tantrum?  Was it at home or in public?

Cheese with that Whine?

I don't know what changed.  Whatever it was it started 2-3 weeks ago.  My two almost three year old has a consta-whine.  She can turn it on at the drop of a hat for no reason at all.  It's almost as if the more her vocabulary grows the less she uses it and just whines for what she wants.  There aren't even words mixed in, it's just a low level "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........."  The more I ask her to use her words or try to guess what she wants the more she mumbles and whines.

Has this happened to any other parent out there?  Has your toddler taken a step forward in development just to jump back down the cliff?  Let me tell you that at times it have to just remove myself to scream.  No it's not that bad.  The whine to me is like nails on a chalk board and can get frustrating because I know very well that she has the vocabulary to ask for what she wants and she just doesn't.

What is your experience?  Does this stage last long?  Will it end?  Please say it will end, gah!

Mini Bully

I picked my daughter up from day care yesterday and was my daughter crying.  One of the girls had just pushed her at the playground before I walk in.  A few days before I was called at work and told my daughter fell off a bridge onto the concrete face first.  Today I watched the same girl push her down.  I know they are toddlers and they can be prone to hitting and pushing from their raging emotions. (rolls eyes)

When is it too far?  Last night and today when I picked her up Izzy has been saying more and more often that Brooke pushed her and she fell down.  Today she even told me in a full sentence "Brooke pushed me and I fell down. It hurts."  During the ride home I asked her if Brooke pushes her a lot and she said yes.  "Brooke pushed me... bridge... I fell down, it hurt."  Is my almost 3 year old really telling me that she's being frequently pushed from one particular girl?  I don't know if I should be concerned at this point.  When should you really take the "message" a 3 year old tells you as what it sounds like?

Have you experienced a "mini bully" at that age?  How much of it is a true personality trait and how much is toddlers with raging emotions?

Parenting Compliments

As a parent you question how you are raising your child and you hope at the end of this journey your child grows up to be a well adjusted, contributing member of society.  My child didn't arrive with an instruction booklet or a pair of glasses the see into the future.  So I don't know if what I'm doing now will result in a positive thing or negative thing.  My daughter is going to turn 2 in two months and she is a Toddler with a capital "T".   There are days that she makes me so frustrated that I need to take a moment to myself to regroup.  While other days my eye get misty and my heart skips a beat because I feel so thankful I'm her mommy.

Since the "terrible twos" and the "toddler tantrums" have made an appearance in our household I've tried different tactics to see what works best with my toddler.  I definitely did not want my daughter to think it was okay to scream, whine, or throw a tantrum to get what she wanted.  I made it a point from the very beginning, that she had to say "please mommy" if she wanted something.  As her vocabulary increased I helped her through simple sentences to ask for what she wanted.  For example, "More milk please mommy." 

These days she's been using the whine/scream/tantrum tactic first and it's been tough to shake her from that bad habit.  Now in the face of all that screaming I keep saying, "You have to use your words, mommy doesn't understand you when you scream like that" until she gives me enough hints to figure out what she's screaming at.  Once I figure out what she wants and she starts to calm down then I prompted her to stand in front of me, cross her arms and use her words to ask mommy nicely for what she wants.  I tell her "It's NOT okay to scream at mommy like that, when you want something you need to use your words and ask mommy nicely."

I really think whatever I'm doing is really working.  We were at that vet today and she started whining.  We went through the steps, stand in front of me, cross her arms, ask nicely, and follow up with thank you.  The vet gave me the BIGGEST COMPLIMENT on my parenting.  She said she's never seen a child with such good manners.  She really liked how I handled it and even said she wants to use that when she has children.   How awesome is that! Toddlers are tough and I'm sure I have more white hair from the stress but that little pat on the back gave me the validation that I just might be doing the right thing after all.  :)

Have you received any comments that made you feel the same?  What were they?  Have you given anyone else positive parenting comments?  What did you see to make you share that compliment?

Discipline

There are times when nothing I do seems to work with my toddler.  It's as though as her confidence grows so does her willingness to talk back.  I'll be the first to admit that I'm no expert at discipline.  I just try my best to reinforce consequences for bad behavior.  Izzy can throw a tantrum like the best of them with the tears, the screaming and even flailing legs for an added affect.  That said I still think that generally Izzy is pretty well behaved.

We had another play date today with our neighbor and her two year old.  It seems a little harsh to say but I think she is out of control.  The first two times I could chalk it up to her being overly tired.  At this point I want to say it's just her behavior.  I watched as she repeatedly did things against her mother's wishes when the consequences weren't enforced.  At one point she came to whisper to me a request that her mother just told her she couldn't do.

I felt for the mother, she genuinely seemed frustrated at her child's behavior. I only reinforced what the mother already told her.  I smiled and inwardly cringed at the havoc she was doing to my house.  I still want the two girls to become friends but I don't' want Bella's bad behavior to rub off on Izzy. Have you ever been in the position where you wanted to jump in but didn't think you should?  Did you ever stop going to a play date in the chance the behavior would rub off on your child?

Labels, labels everywhere!

A guest post by Amanda Lehrman from The Momma Files.
Amanda Lehrman has a background in education and is a mother to her son Jack.  This is her final post in the September Education Series as a  guest writer for Mama Tales.

With the various spelling strategies taught in school, many parents struggle with which one to use at home. Some of you tell your child to sound out the word, some say to look it up in the dictionary or refer to spell check on the computer. I believe that a combination of these strategies can be used, often depending on your individual child. The one universal piece of advice I have is to let each child explore his or her surroundings and come to a conclusion on his or her own.

This spelling tip will allow them to do just that. It can be used for children of all ages; it will just need to be adapted based on the grade level. It may sound strange but it is a tactic that I used in my Kindergarten and 1st grade classrooms that worked tremendously well. It is also a suggestion I made to the upper elementary, middle and high school teachers I worked with after teaching in the classroom. I/we labeled our classroom and you are going to label your house! Yes, label your house. Everything in it. The doors, the food, the refrigerator, the toilets, the televisions, etc.

Sound weird? Let me explain. When my students entered their classroom the first few days, everything was new. We wrote and drew a lot at the beginning of the year and there were so many questions of, “how do you spell this?” and “how do you spell that?” We hadn’t learned all of the sounding out strategies yet, they didn’t know how to use a dictionary or a word wall, much less spell check on a computer, and so what was I to do? Everyone got a bunch of index cards and tape and we started labeling. However they thought a word should be spelled, that’s how it went up on the index card. The only way it was corrected was when someone realized that a word was spelled differently. This happened when we were reading together, when they were reading alone, when someone saw a sign for the word “shelves” and realized that our class spelling was incorrect. We would cross out, never erase, the incorrect spelling and write the correct version underneath. Gradually, my students became aware of their surroundings and started to notice words and the patterns that they followed. They took an interest in how words were spelled and why certain combinations of letters created
certain sounds. It was the most successful way to have them take ownership of their own learning. One by one, week by week, all of the words in our classroom were labeled correctly and they remained posted around the room for the entire school year. They used these index cards as reference points and before they knew it, they did not need the index card; they had committed the correct spelling to memory. Mission accomplished.

The same can be done around your home. It is a fun way to incorporate spelling into your child’s life, outside of the classroom setting. If your child is younger, you can start with simple words such as bed, light and door. Even if the index card just has a b on it, that is a great start. If they want to draw a picture of a bed or find a picture of a bed in a magazine and use that, go with it. Any interest is a genuine one. Foster and encourage it.

If your child is older or you want to challenge them, you can add words such as television, refrigerator and staircase. Perhaps they will be on an educational website, see the spelling of mirror and realize that the spelling looks different from how it was spelled on the index card on your bathroom mirror. Maybe they will see a sign for apricots in the supermarket and realize the correct spelling of the word. It will happen in random locations, at random times but having your child understand the importance of spelling and realize the feeling of accomplishment will never be random. It will be priceless! Try it out and let me know how it goes!

Writing starts with W!

The third guest post in the September series by Amanda Lehrman from The Momma Files.
Amanda Lehrman has a background in education and is a mother to her son Jack.  Please check back here next Monday for her last post of the September series on tips to prepare your little ones for school.


Writing is funny.  There are so many rules to follow, lines to stay in and utensils to use.  It's all very technical, especially to a child.  In my opinion, it is too technical.  By the time we get through the rules and such, the creativity is gone.  Shouldn't we foster this creativity first and then introduce the rules later?

Photo credit tonyastaab.com

Children preschool age and below should be writing from the time they can put a writing utensil (sans permanent marker!) to a piece of paper.  Just like with reading, it will not be in conventional sense in which we are accustomed.  It will be a dot here and a line there.  There will be no rhyme or reason but they will be introduced to the concept of putting the pencil or crayon to the paper and making something of their own.  We do with with my 1 year old son.  We have him hold a pencil and help him move it around when we sign birthday cards, etc.  Hand these drawings up on the refrigerator or create a "gallery" of artwork/writing pieces from your child on the wall (painters tape does not peel paint).  The earlier we celebrate their hard work and creative side, the more comfortable they will feel expressing themselves through art or writing.

After the initial phase, your child will most likely learn to sit with a writing utensil, draw pictures and "write".  When this begins, have a special place for their materials.  We call this a "Writing Station" in my classroom; adopt this at home.  Have a bin for different types of paper; construction, computer, lined paper included.  Allow them to use all of these choices and tell them the actual names of the paper to help them identify what they want.  In addition, have different writing utensils in soup cans, coffee cans or shoe boxes for easy accessibility.  Pencils, crayons, water color paint, chalk, colored pencils and markers (if your are brave!) should all be introduced as different mediums.  Challenge your child to mix and explore mediums.  Suggest creating a pencil and water color picture or draw with chalk on a dark colored piece of paper.  These creations can include pictures, words, stickers and any other form of decoration they like.

At first, you may not know what their pictures resemble.  This is OK.  Ask them to describe what they drew. If they are curious on hot to draw something such as an animal, find a picture either in a book or on the computer and show them.  They will also become interested in learning how to write their names.  They will probably ask you how to spell it.  Spell the name out loud and based on readiness level, write the letters and have them trace over them or write the letters and have them copy underneath your writing.  Do no stress over backwards letters (ie: B and D).  This is normal.  Their name is one of the first things children learn to write and spell correctly.  It will be a hug accomplishment for them!

As children get older, their pictures and writing will become more legible.  You will know that the picture is either of a cow or a rhinoceros.  You may not be sure which, but it's narrowed down to one of those!  A helpful hint done with my Kindergartners was labeling their pictures.  Even if the words were spelled totally wrong and the letters mixed up, it was an introduction to writing.  I modeled by showing them an example of a labeled picture (a house scene with grass, flowers, tress, a plane flying overhead, a sun shining, etc).  I drew a line next to each picture and wrote the word.  Have them create a picture and draw lines next to each word.  They should explore with forming letters and deciding which ones they think spell out each word.  Writing is also great for honing a child's fine motor skills.

There is a time and place for learning the rules of writing.  Once school begins, these will come into place for children.  They have time to explore before these technical aspects arrive.  Foster this independent exploration and show them that it is OK to create without rules, lines or dangling participles.  :)

Reading Starts With R!

The second guest post in the September series by Amanda Lehrman from The Momma Files.
Amanda Lehrman has a background in education and is a mother to her son Jack.  Please check back here for more educational tips to prepare your little ones for school.

Reading is a skill that starts before the days of school.  It begins with babies recognizing pictures in a book and progresses naturally as that child gets older.  My son has a book of first works that was introduced to him when he was a few weeks old.  He knows this book as well as he know us.  For a child who is extremely active and mobile, he will sit still and point to the pictures when we read to him.  The earlier parents begin exposing children to literature and literacy, the more beneficial it will be for those sons and daughters.

If your child is in pre-school or day care they are most likely "reading" every day.  They look at signs in their classroom, they recognize their name on a chair or a cubby and they look at books.  They are reading.  It may not be in the conventional way that we picture it but it is most definitely reading.

If your child is not in a school environment yet, there are plenty of things to do to expose your child to these skills.  Continue reading books every day.  Repeat their favorites as many times as they request.  You may start to notice that they anticipate the next page.  Foster this as much as you can.  Ask them questions about the following pages.  What character will we see next?  What happens to Elmo on the next page?  Even though they cannot read the words, they know exactly what is going on in the book.

Take it a step further and try introducing pattern books.  Many of these books have the same sentence on each page, aside from the last word.  For example, a book can read, "The bear is big", "the bear is brown", " the bear is little" etc.  Even if your child cannot read the words. they will read the book through the pictures.  They will know which description word comes next.  If you think they are ready, introduce questions such as "where is the word brown on this page?" or "What letter does bear begin with"?

It is never too early to introduce children to reading.  They are sponges, taking in everything, even if they cannot verbally express what they are learning.  Give them the chance to amaze you; expose them to literacy early on and you will be pleasantly surprised to see what they can do!

ABC, Easy as 123

A guest post by Amanda Lehrman from The Momma Files.
Amanda Lehrman has a background in education and is a mother to her son Jack.  She will be a guest writer for Mama Tales during the month of September on Mondays.  Please check back here for more educational tips to prepare your little ones for school.

From a very young age, children notice everything; planes, lights, signs, pictures. Parents should take advantage of this opportunity to expose their children to everything educational, especially letters and numbers. These are found everywhere, especially on educational toys. However, sometimes they are not an interactive part of the toy. Many of these toys have letters and numbers ingrained in the plastic. Take your child’s finger and trace them. Repeat them as you do this. Make this part of the toy as exciting as the light up buttons and talking animals.

Using different textures is a good way to teach children. Becoming familiar with the feel of letters and numbers will help them recognize and eventually write them. Set up a touch and feel letter/number poster in your house. A few pieces of poster board will work perfectly. Have each letter/number cut and displayed in a few different textures. Sandpaper is a great choice, as well as cotton balls, pasta and glitter. Run your child’s finger over the textured letter/number cutouts and repeat the name as you do this.

A favorite texture to use is sand. If you live near a beach, take advantage of the end of the summer by drawing letters in the sand. Write your child’s name in the sand and have them trace your writing. For indoor sand use, take a bowl of sand (you can find sand at hardware or craft stores) and have them draw letters/numbers and repeat the name of each one. If your child is ready, you can write their name and have them trace it with their finger, a pencil or a crayon. To make this more interactive, play a game where you call out a letter or number and they record it on a piece of paper.

Another simple way to work on letter and number concepts is to use your everyday life. You can count toys as you clean up, count fingers and toes on your child as you get them dressed, count the plates as you set the table. Have your children help you do these tasks and count out loud. Even if they begin with saying, 1, 2, 10, they are aware that numbers are ordered; the correct pattern will follow. Repeat the numbers and say the alphabet, even when you do not think they are paying attention. Show them the numbers on a clock, the microwave, the cable box. Highlight the letters on the refrigerator, in books, on the computer. Children listen to everything, they hang on our words. If you say something enough, they will begin to repeat.

Singing is a way to introduce and reinforce the alphabet and numbers. From a very early age, children, even babies, recognize songs. Even though they may not know what you are saying initially, it will become a familiar tune and eventually, they will start to repeat the song. There are many tapes and CDs with educational songs. Play them at home and when you are in your car. Consistently exposing them to important concepts will lead to recognition and understanding.

Remember that children are sponges; they soak up everything around them. Make learning fun for them. Make them feel like they are discovering something brand new to the world; even though it may only be brand new to them. Celebrating their efforts and praising their successes will encourage them to keep learning and keep discovering.

Random Toys

Personally, I think today's toys do too much.  Walking through the aisles at the toys store most of the toys I see are battery operated and play music or make some sort of sound.  When I was a kid, the toys we had made us use our imagination.  They didn't do anything special unless we invented a story ourselves.  As a parent, I try to balance the "old school" toys with the "new school" toys.  The ironic thing is that at her age she easily grows tired of them.

This morning I found a great toy accidentally.  A package arrived with a strip of packing bubbles.  I laid the strip down on the floor and she's been playing tea party on it for the past 20 minutes.  Or she'll run up and down the strip screaming.  She's not heavy enough to make them pop but I think she likes the texture under her feet.  Hey, I'm a mom on a budget.  If I can find something that peaks her interest and saves my wallet I'm all for it.  What about you?  Did you stubble upon a random household item that your kids went gaga for?  Join in on the conversation.

Discipline for Toddlers

Yesterday, a friend of mine posted to her Facebook "As a stay at home mom there are a few days I want to scream 'I don't want to do this sh#@ no more!!!  That would be today.'"  I could feel the frustration she was feeling by her words.  I am confident I can say that all moms have been there at least once during their time as a parent.  Even with the love we feel for our children there are times when the battle of wills becomes too much and our frustration overwhelms us.

Emotions

This is especially true during toddlerhood.  My daughter tests her limits and mine on a daily basis.  At some moments it's repeating an action I don't want her to do.  Other times she's unable to deal with her own anger or frustration which results in a temper tantrum of epic proportions.  At home, the tantrums are easier to deal with the ones out in public.  I try my best not to be that mom with the out of control child.  You know the ones I'm talking about.

The question I pose to you is what are your methods of dealing with discipline?  I found an article at Baby Center about successful discipline strategies for every age.  Have you ever tried these?  Do they work for you?  Join in on the conversation.

SCORE!

My little booger at the Aquarium

Last night was the best one yet.  I hope I don't jinx myself.  We had the same bedtime routine, milk, snack, diaper change and a story before bedtime.  She had a little bit of nursing and was out in about 10 minutes.  The only time she woke up was for about 5 minutes around 11:45pm because she was cold.  After a little bit of back rubbing and a warm blanket she was fast asleep until 4am.  Since she was born, last night was the longest blocks of sleep EVER!  At 4am I laid down with her in her room and let her nurse for a job well done.  :P  Then she slept again until close to 8:15am.  This is super AWESOME!  I'm doing the happy dance right now.  If you been following my posts for the last weeks I'm sure you've read how sleep deprived I've been.  I'm so proud of my baby and myself for sticking through with my goal.  Next week, I'm tackling the nursing before bedtime.  Wish me luck mommas!

Choices

This past week I've been focused on one thing.  No, that's not entirely accurate.  My focus with Izzy has been on one thing.  My goal is to wean her completely from nursing.  She is turning two the second week of September and I would like for her to no longer be nursing for any amount of time by then.  That might be an unreasonable deadline so at the very latest before we relocate to WA in October.

The amount of time a mom breastfeeds their child is completely a personal choice.  That being said, moms still get solicited and unsolicited advice as well as positive and negative comments about their choice.  I've read and heard some horror stories moms have gone through with co-workers, bosses, friends and family.  Moms have been criticized on whether or not they breastfeed, the length they do so and when and where they should be allowed to.

I bring this up because during this past week I've gotten the gamete of responses on my journey to wean through twitter, facebook, text, blog, etc.  I want to extend my gratitude to all the readers that extended their support not only for my choice to breastfeed but on my journey to wean.  What I'm surprised at is how some of the readers were down right scornful that I breastfed as long as I did.

Let me remind you that this is a personal blog about my tales as a mom and it reflects my personal choices.  Besides, if there was a zombie Armageddon, my family's survivability would be higher since I'm able to whip out a boob to feed my kid.  Thank you and GOOD NIGHT!

I See Da Light!

I'm feeling pretty good this morning!  We're up a little on the early side but that was mainly due to hubby grabbing the trash for trash day.  If you read yesterday's post, That Blasted Chair I'm sure you could read my frustration at the lack of sleep I was getting.  Last night when she woke up I just took her back to her room and laid down with her on my chest.  I was so tired that I knocked out.  She must have fell asleep  because I vaguely remember rolling her down next to me.  I'm sure she woke up a little here and there through the night and in my half conscious state I'm sure I rub her or something like that.  I know two things are for sure though, she didn't get to nurse last night and there wasn't any ear piercing cries.  So I'm pleased to announced that I made it through six nights without nursing her in the middle of the night.  I might be sleep deprived but I'm still alive.

There are some positive gains through this ordeal.  She's eating more at meals, sleeping longer stretches of time and learning to fall asleep without nursing.  I'm feeling pretty confident next week we (oh wait I really mean me) can cut out nursing before bed.  That one will be the hardest unless hubby mans up and jumps into help.  That's right, I said it!  Hubby if you read this HELP me HELP us!  Momma needs more sleep at night.

I've been the sole caregiver for Izzy since she popped out.  That's including the time before I became a SAHM and I was working 12 hour night shifts to get off and watch Izzy.  But that my dear mommas is another story or vent which ever you think applies.  Have a good weekend and wish me luck on the journey to wean my dear daughter from "da Boob".

That Blasted Chair

Man, I am SO tired this morning.  Last night was the fifth night I've been trying to weaning Izzy from nursing in the middle of the night.  I think the second night was a fluke since each night after that I've had to sit in the rocking chair for her to stay asleep.  I seriously feel like I did when she was a new born and was nursing every two hours.  I would sit in the rocking chair and end up falling asleep there with her until the next feeding.  Which meant that I would end up staying in that chair all night.  I'd wake up with a numb butt, sore neck and back.

That's what last night felt like.  I think I spent 3 or 4 hours in that rocking chair either trying to keep her asleep or sleeping there myself.  I also could NOT sleep.  I literally laid down at 10:15pm hoping to get some sleep before she woke up.  Not a chance, I tossed and turned until she woke up around 12:45am.  From then, I was in that blasted chair.  GRRR!  I was so delirious that I ended up letting her nurse at 4am instead of 6am.  I'm not sure if that will put me back another step or not.

There was one funny thing she did last night.  I laid down with her and I guess she notice the boob.  She didn't whine or cry but started maneuvering herself closer.  She even trying getting one out herself until I said something.  Then she rolled over gave me this HUGE cheesy smile and pointed to her diaper.  Haha Yea right, kiddo trying to be all sly for a sneak attack.

Step Back or Forward?

Last night was my fourth night at weaning Izzy from the middle of the night nursing.  On the third night there was no crying or asking for the boob she just had a little trouble falling back to sleep.  I was hoping, praying and crossing my fingers that last night would be at least the same or better.   I was sadly mistaken.  I recently put my foot down to wean Izzy by her second birthday which is less than a month away.  The only times she nurses is before bed, before a nap and during the night.   You can read about the first, second and third days here. 

For some reason she was having trouble staying asleep and falling asleep.  Okay she was having trouble sleep.  Since everything trickles down the same hill I in turn, also didn't sleep.  Last night was the first night I started feeling a little frustrated with the whole process.  I know I should consider the progress she did make.  I guess to me it was steps backward and I don't want to go back to night time feedings.

Let me explain.  No, she didn't get the boob last night but all my tricks for putting her to sleep wasn't working.  I held her, laid down with her, sat in the rocker with her, rubbed her back, etc.  It seems like the only way she was able to sleep was being held upright and that wasn't comfortable.  I really couldn't tell you how much sleep we were actually getting I was in a constant zombie state and I still feel like I am.  The only positive is that it wasn't a constant ear piercing cry like it was on the first night and she still didn't nurse last night.  Please, oh please let tonight be better.  An hour of sleep here and there isn't enough for me.  Wish me luck mommas!  I'll NEED it. 

Who Knew?

It's getting better and better!  What a relief!  Last night was my third night weaning Izzy from the middle of the night feeding. You can read about the first and second nights here.  She was asleep by 9pm and had a little bit of trouble settling down for the night.  She woke up for less than 5 minutes at 11pm and ended up falling back to sleep before I even got to the rocking chair.  It was close to 3:46am that she woke up again.

At 3:46am she came into our room and quieted right down as soon as I picked her up.  After a diaper change I laid back down with her and rubbed she back but otherwise didn't engage her.  This time it was a little harder for her to fall asleep but she never cried or asked for the boob.  She just laid down and watched me.  I must have dozed off because the next time she woke up was at 6am.  By that time I heard my hubby getting ready for work so I figured that's what woke her up.  So I let her nurse at 6am like I did yesterday.

If I don't count that short wake up at 11pm, she's already sleeping for longer and longer periods of time since I started weaning.  She hardly cried like she did that first time, just when she initially woke up.  To my surprise she didn't ask for the boob all night even though she was having trouble falling asleep.  I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!  If this keeps going in a positive direction I just might make my goal of weaning her before her birthday. 

What? No Screaming?

Last night was my second night at weaning Izzy from the middle of the night feedings.  I tried to judge what horrors I would be facing based on the first night and from other mom's experiences.  I figured that I would have to face up to a week of murderous crying and sleepless nights.  To my pleasant surprise it wasn't half as bad as I geared myself up for.  Right before bed I made her a blueberry smoothie, read her a bedtime story and nursed her.  She went to bed around 8:15 pm with no problems and didn't wake up again for SIX hours.  That's right she slept for SIX hours!  The longest she's ever slept in one sitting was 5 hours and even those are random.

Even when she woke up she just whined a little bit.  The only thing I had to do was hold her and rub her back while I was sitting in the rocking chair for about 25 minutes and she was OUT!  No crying, no screaming, no kicking her legs on the floor or any other tantrum because I didn't give her the boob.  Even when I said no to her requests she just settled down.  I am SHOCKED!  She stayed asleep for another 90 minute before waking up again.  This time was a little harder to settle her down and ended up laying down with her on my stomach.  Again, I stuck to my guns and no feeding.

It wasn't until around 5:30-6am and I finally let her nurse.  So that still counts, right?  The only downside was that it took me longer to fall back asleep each time I put her down.  I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop that never happened.  I'm hoping for a similar outcome tonight.  Make that I'm praying for a similar outcome tonight.  Wish me luck!